Wednesday, September 28, 2005


By Stockton

According to sources close to Bad Vernacular, a memo has been distributed to a number of news outlets advising them of important changes in media categories.

To: Media Personnel
From: Media Management
RE: Revised Categorization of National Mood

With the President's popularity at an all-time low and support for the Iraq War at an all-time low, new guidelines re: categorizing the mood of the nation will be implemented.

- The 58% of people disapproving of the president's performance will be known as "those slightly skeptical of the President's performance."

- The 55% who now disapprove of the Iraq War will no longer be "fringe anti-war activists" but now called a "substantial minority."

- The 57% who are dissatisfied with the direction of the country will now be called "a growing, but vocal, minority."

-President Bush will no longer be called "the popular Republican President." He will be called, "the President more popular than Benjamin Franklin Pierce."

Please see that these changes are implemented immediately.

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