Tuesday, March 29, 2005

NEWS WRAP-UP

By Stockton

The Editors would like to apologize to our reader for the sparse posting of late. Community service is taking up much of my time and Tweed is standing vigil outside Tom Delay's home. Much has happened in the past week. So here's a news roundup:

Michael Jackson

In a shocking admission during his trial for child molestation, Michael Jackson admitted that Billie Jean was indeed his lover and not, we repeat not, just a girl he knew. And the kid is his son.

Focus on the Family

After weeks of intense criticism from Christian James Dobson, a teary-eyed Sponge Bob has finally admitted that he and Patrick are "more than friends." The admission came on an episode of The 700 Club.

Bob & Patrick, more than friends

The beloved cartoon character will be spending the remainder of the Spring here, in the hopes that he can pray away the gay.

Election 2008

Bad Vernacular had thought it had a Democratic dream ticket in Herseth - Landrieu until Elwood at Windy City Blues nominated Debbie Schultz of Florida.


Even if she doesn't make the ticket, I think we may have our Secretary of State.



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